Me ....

Being me comes with a price. Everyone can say thats true. Allow me to explain what I mean.

Its been about a year and a half since I moved back to Oklahoma. I can remember when I first moved back some of the intense times that God talked to me. I needed to hear from him in such a big way. One of the things I remember distinctly hearing was - "I made you the way you are, to say what other people won't say, so don't be afraid to say what I tell you to say".
Well that comes with a price. To say the things most people won't say, its usually the things people don't want to hear. But, it generally produces results people don't expect. So its something of a gift, but it comes with a price.

I'm a strong woman, with much to say, and I won't stop saying what needs to be said. It's who I am, who God made me to be. Its necessary, its on purpose, and although it comes in an unlikely package, its me!!

There is so much to be done right now. There is a world of hurting people that need us all to do our part. We all need people around us that will tell the truth, encourage us to keep going, remind us why were doing what we are doing, help us see where we are missing it, make us accountable, love us unconditionally, cry with us, laugh with us, be excited with us, and listen to us. I am greatful for those people in my life, and I will never stop being that for those who will let me in their life!

In all of this thought process, which might be boarderline rambling, I know this, that we are in this life with a purpose. It has always been my hearts desire to live by purpose, not just live. I believe that if your going to do something, do it with 2 things - purpose and passion. Without those 2 things it all seems pointless. I never want to be pointless. I want to be like Paul in the Bible. That guy was a total stud!! He pulled no punches, said what needed to be said, and made a difference everywhere he went. He never waisted time, listened to God, and did whatever it took to get the job done. He's my hero!!

Listen to what he said: 2 Corinthians 11:
5For I consider myself not a whit lower than the very chiefest apostles. 6Though I am rude in speech, yet I am not in knowledge; for we have been made thoroughly manifest among you in all things. 7Have I committed an offense in abasing myself that ye might be exalted, because I have preached to you the Gospel of God without charge? 8I robbed other churches, taking wages from them to do you service. 9And when I was present with you and was in want, I was burdensome to no man, for that which I lacked the brethren who came from Macedonia supplied; and in all things I have kept myself from being burdensome to you, and so will I keep myself. 10As the truth of Christ is in me, no man shall stop me from this boasting in the regions of Achaia. 11Why so? Because I love you not? God knoweth! 12But what I do, that I will continue to do, that I may cut off occasion from those who desire occasion, that wherein they glory they may be found even as we. 13For such are false apostles, deceitful workers, transforming themselves into the apostles of Christ. 14And no marvel, for Satan himself is transformed into an angel of light. 15Therefore it is no great thing if his ministers also be transformed as the ministers of righteousness, whose end shall be according to their works. 16I say again, let no man think me a fool. But if otherwise, yet as a fool receive me, that I may boast of myself a little. 17(That which I now speak, I speak it not from the Lord, but as it were foolishly, in this confidence as boasting. 18Since many glory in the flesh, I will glory also.) 19For ye suffer fools gladly, seeing ye yourselves are wise! 20For ye suffer if a man bring you into bondage, or if a man devour you, if a man take from you, if a man exalt himself, if a man smite you on the face. 21I speak as reproached, as though we had been weak. However it be, whereinsoever anyone is bold (I speak foolishly), I am bold also. 22Are they Hebrews? So am I. Are they Israelites? So am I. Are they the seed of Abraham? So am I. 23Are they ministers of Christ? (I speak as a fool) I am more -- in labors more abundant, in stripes beyond measure, in prisons more frequent, in deaths often. 24From the Jews five times I received forty stripes less one. 25Thrice was I beaten with rods, once was I stoned; thrice I suffered shipwreck, a night and a day adrift in the deep; 26in journeyings often, in perils from waters, in perils from robbers, in perils from mine own countrymen, in perils from the heathen, in perils in the city, in perils in the wilderness, in perils in the sea, in perils among false brethren; 27in weariness and painfulness, in sleeplessness often, in hunger and thirst, in fastings often, in cold and nakedness. 28Besides those things which are external, there is that which cometh upon me daily: the care for all the churches! 29Who is weak, and I am not weak? Who is offended, and I burn not? 30If I must glory, I will glory in the things which concern mine infirmities. 31The God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who is blessed for evermore, knoweth that I lie not.

I love that guy!! He saw things other people would never see, He saw God move in ways people couldn't inagine, but he was willing to do things other people were not.

Thats my food for thought today.
Peace!!!

I just felt like writing this today.......

I guess thats what I have been thinking about.

"Affect" : to act on; produce an effect or change in , to impress the mind or move the feelings of.
"Effect" : power to produce results; efficacy; force; validity; influence

Okay, so if you know me, then you know that I love God, I love to tell people about God, I love evangelism, and I love knowing that someones life has been changed because of the Gospel. So heres the thing, I recognise that when I take an opportunity to share Gods love with someone it causes an effect in their life, but it causes me to be affected. I'm affected every time I see God move. It does something to me. It does something to my heart.

When you see God move, your heart is moved whether its on your behalf or someone elses. Its amazing that you are given the opportunity to experiance someone elses journey with God. Even if your just there to hear about it, becomes a piece of your journey with God too. Something you can look back on as another example of God to you.

For over a year I have been voulenteering at a small Methodist church on the north side of town. This church was established as a prison ministry church. Every Thursday night men and women from local halfway house/work release status inmates are brought to this church for a service, coffee and doughnuts, and a class. Here is the amazing thing, It basically voulenteer run. I'm the youngest voulenteer, most are 60+ years old. These men and women come faithfully, Sundays and Thursdays. They drive buses and vans to each facility and bring the men and women to the church. They run the service, they teach the classes, they spend time and build relationships with the men and women that come, they spend their time, their energy, their emotions on these people. This is week after week. The pastor of this church gets paid very little, but he has a real heart for the people. He exudes the love of God like noone I have met in a long time. this man is humble, and loving, he is a real example of Jesus.

So I go, this affects me. I am inspired, I am challenged, I am moved.

I teach a class, a 12 step faith based drug and alcohol class. To most this places me in a box. I do "prison ministry" and I teach a drug and alcohol class. See, heres the thing, this is an opportunity for me to involve myself in peoples lives on a weekly basis. I am opening up myself to be affected. I am causing effect in peoples lives. I have been moved so many times in the last year. I don't have huge inspiring stories, but I do have stories. I do know that people have been changed. I know that I have made a difference. I know that just by me being there, I am effecting people, and I am being afected. This is worth it to me.

This is what its all about. Effecting causes affecting. You wont be affected until you start effecting. Every day you have opportunities at your house, with your neighbors, at the grocery store, at church, whereever you are - opportunity after opportunity, after opportunity to effect people.

My thoughts arent original, many things have led me to think about this today, but I have resolved to think about this all the time. I want this idea to be on the front of my brain. I want to effect people. I want people to know that God is real, He loves them, He does stuff for them, He is not dissapointed in them, He is a giver, a miracle worker, a friend, a provider, a hope giver, a future maker, and whatever they need. And I know that the more I do this the more effected I become.

Its time to start effecting, and being affected. People need us!

God Must Be Busy.............

Okay so I been brewing on this for a little while. I know its been forever since I blogged, and maybe noone will read this, but this ones for me to get it out.

Theres this new song I have heard on the radio. Its country, so don't hold it against me heres the words:


That anchor man says the fight began somewhere in the Middle East.
The world prays for peace.
There's a single mom just got laid off when she lost a job
to some foreign hands in some faraway land.

Last night in Oklahoma some twister took thirteen
and they're praying that they find the missing three.
God must be busy.
That highway sign went from slow ahead to traffic's dead.
Thought it couldn't get worse than that Amber Alert.

They say she's 4,Colorado plates, headed out-of-statein a Chevy van.
It's hard to understand. You can see it in the faces
of all those highway strangers,they're praying that God
keeps that girl from danger.
God must be busy.

And I know in the big picture I'm just a speck of sand and
God's got better things to do than look out for one man.
I know he's heard my prayers cause he hears everything,
he just ain't answered back or he'd bring you back to me. God must be busy.


Okay so here it is - this is how people feel about God. Its very sad because this means that the representations of God have allowed people to buy into this. We as Christians are allowing God to take the bum rap for our lazyness!

I'm not great with words, but I have this deep sadness right now realizing that this is true. This is what people think. People think God is too busy to help them, too busy to hear them, too busy to care for them. The real problem, is Gods people are too busy to help them, too busy to hear them, and too busy to care for them.

I might take a little flack for saying this, but sometimes I don't want to be called a "Christian". It has such a negative meaning to most people. I just want to be Melissa - that girl thats not like most people. Shes normal, but when I need something, she always seems to care, to be touchable, and things seem to change. This seems like a good representation of God to me. Jesus didn't walk around having to preface His title, He just was who He was supposed to be. He acted like His father, He WAS a represenation of God to the world......and I guarantee noone walked away saying - Jesus must be busy

Think about it